Depression has so many faces and so many stages and factors: hormones, cycles, life stages, grief, loss, seasonal affective disorder (SAD is a real thing. It involves science behind a season with more dark and less light, messing with our circadian rhythm, among other things) From the fleeting mood that lasts a few days to the deep, hopelessness that can go on for years.
It can be debilitating.
I get it.
I see you.
You are not alone.
You think you should just “get over it” but it’s not that easy, is it?
This darkness, the shadows lurking in the corner…you know you want to be better, you know you should do something to feel better.
But that’s just it, isn’t it? In this moment, you don’t really want to feel better…
Well of course you do…But the effort…eh!
You don’t want to put forth the effort it requires. You don’t want to pretend. For now, you want to wallow in your self-destructive pity.
No judgement… that’s how I feel when I’m in it. Everything in your head, and out your mouth is negative. You hear it, but you can’t stop it. Everything seems to be going wrong. Nothing is working and nothing makes sense.
You may put on a friendly smile but there is an emptiness in those eyes.
But sometimes, in that darkness, in the stillness, you get answers. You get clarity. Be patient and listen. You may see what is no longer working in your life anymore. Things that you may need to let go of that are no longer serving you. You may get inspiration for things you can change. Inspiration to do what you’ve always wanted to do. Things that wouldn’t have gotten your attention otherwise.
You may get nothing. Just meet with the darkness and sit with it awhile. Without judgement of it, or of yourself, and just be.
In this world, nothing is permanent, not even our struggles. Acceptance and openness are the first steps in lifting yourself up and creating change.
If you need to talk to someone, reach out. I know in my moments, that’s the last thing I wanted to do. But it does help. Write it out. Yell it out! Give your feelings a voice. They just want to be heard, like everyone else.
And when you feel the shift happening, go with it.
Dress up! Make yourself feel pretty (or handsome), even if it is from bedroom to couch. Do something kind to yourself or for someone else. Go for a walk. Do something creative. Journal. Read something inspirational. Give yourself a break. Give yourself credit. Write down 5 things you are good at, and then 5 more.
And if you want additional support, the work that I do has profound ability to address the areas that are keeping you stuck in the loop of despair and hopelessness. There are probably areas of your childhood (most of our programming and beliefs are created by the age of 8) that are affecting you to this day. Things that you wouldn’t even realize still bother you. Things that still affect how you live and even the decisions you make on a daily basis.
Things that could also be contributing to your depression.
What would it feel like if you could let go of all of that? Who would you be without that? What would it hurt to try?
Comment or email me if you would like to see what could be possible. How it would feel to break free!
